Duke Ellington Ballroom, DeKalb (IL)

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Track List

  • Duke Ellington Ballroom, DeKalb (IL)
    •  1 . Tonight, Tonight
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 4:15

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2035564

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      Lyrics

      Time is never time at all

      You can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth

      And our lives are forever changed

      We will never be the same

      The more you change the less you feel

      Believe, believe in me, believe

      That life can change, that you're not stuck in vain

      We're not the same, we're different tonight

      Tonight, so bright

      Tonight

      And you know you're never sure

      But you're sure you could be right

      If you held yourself up to the light

      And the embers never fade in your city by the lake

      The place where you were born

      Believe, believe in me, believe

      In the resolute urgency of now

      And if you believe there's not a tonight

      Tonight, so bright

      Tonight

      We'll crucify the insincere tonight

      We'll make things right, we'll feel it all tonight

      We'll find a way to offer up the night tonight

      The indescribable moments of your life tonight

      The impossible is possible tonight

      Believe in me as I believe in you, tonight

    •  2 . Zero
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 2:40

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2035569

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      Lyrics

      My reflection, dirty mirror

      There's no connection to myself

      I'm your lover, I'm your zero

      I'm the face in your dreams of glass

      So save your prayers

      For when we're really gonna need 'em

      Throw out your cares and fly

      Wanna go for a ride?

      She's the one for me

      She's all I really need

      Cause she's the one for me

      Emptiness is loneliness, and loneliness is cleanliness

      And cleanliness is godliness, and god is empty just like me

      Intoxicated with the madness, I'm in love with my sadness

      Bullshit fakers, enchanted kingdoms

      The fashion victims chew their charcoal teeth

      I never let on, that I was on a sinking ship

      I never let on that I was down

      You blame yourself, for what you can't ignore

      You blame yourself for wanting more

      She's the one for me

      She's all I really need

      She's the one for me

      She's my one and only

    •  3 . Disarm
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 3:17

      BMI Number: 1776748

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      Lyrics

      Disarm you with a smile

      And cut you like you want me to

      Cut that little child

      Inside of me and such a part of you

      Ooh, the years burn

      I used to be a little boy

      So old in my shoes

      And what I choose is my choice

      What's a boy supposed to do?

      The killer in me is the killer in you

      My love

      I send this smile over to you

      Disarm you with a smile

      And leave you like they left me here

      To wither in denial

      The bitterness of one who's left alone

      Ooh, the years burn

      Ooh, the years burn, burn, burn

      I used to be a little boy

      So old in my shoes

      And what I choose is my voice

      What's a boy supposed to do?

      The killer in me is the killer in you

      My love

      I send this smile over to you

      The killer in me is the killer in you

      Send this smile over to you

      The killer in me is the killer in you

      Send this smile over to you

      The killer in me is the killer in you

      Send this smile over to you

    •  4 . Fuck You
      Details

      Title extra: (An Ode To No One) live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 4:50

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2035606

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      Lyrics

      I'm never coming back

      I'm never giving in

      I'll never be the shine in your spit

      I disconnect the act

      I disconnect the dots

      I disconnect the me in me

      And you're mistaken, it's you that's faking

      Living and breathing and dying too

      This message is for anyone who dares to hear a fool

      You can't bring me back, you can't bring me back

      Cause I give it all back to you

      Thru sacred alleys, the living wrecks

      Wreak their havoc upon this world

      The disenchanted, the romantics,

      The body and face and soul of you is gone down that deep black hole

      Destroy the mind-destroy the body-but you cannot destroy the heart

      And you, you make me so I need to disconnect

      And you make it so real

      I don't need you love to disconnect

      To runaround kids in get-go cars

      With vaseline afterbirths and neon coughs

      Galaxies full of nobodies

      Giving us the farewell runarounds

      I took a virgin mary axe to his sweet baby jane,

      Lost my innocence to a no good girl,

      Scratch my face with anvil hands,

      And coil my tongue around a bumblebee mouth

      And I give it all back to you

      No way, I don't need it, I don't need your love to disconnect

      And you make it, so real, I don't need your love to disconnect

      No way to disconnect

      And you make it so real

      I don't need your love to disconnect

      No way to disconnect

    •  5 . Rocket
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 4:06

      BMI Number: 1776746

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      Lyrics

      Bleed in your own light

      Dream of your own life

      I miss me

      I miss everything I'll never be

      And on, and on

      I torch my soul to show

      The world that I am pure

      Deep inside my heart

      No more lies

      A crown of horns

      An image formed deformed

      The mark I've borne

      A mark of scorn to you

      Consume my love, devour my hate

      Only powers my escape

      The moon is out, the stars invite

      I think I'll leave tonight

      So soon I'll find myself alone

      To relax and fade away

      Do you know what's coming down

      Do you know I couldn't stay free?

      I shall be free

      I shall be free

      I shall be free

      I shall be free

      I shall be free free

      Free of those voices inside me

      I shall be free

      I shall be free

    •  6 . Thru The Eyes Of Ruby
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 7:38

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2107451

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      Lyrics

      Wrap me up in always, and drag me in with maybes

      Your innocence is treasure, your innocence is death

      Your innocence is all I have

      Breathing underwater, and living under glass

      And if you spin your love around

      The secrets of your dreams

      You may find your love is gone

      And is not quite what it seemed

      To appear to disappear

      Beneath all your darkest fears

      I believe in never, I believe in all the way

      But belief is not to notice, believe is just some faith

      And faith can't help you to escape

      And with this ring I wed thee true

      And with this ring I wed thee now

      And with this ring I play so dead

      But no one's asking for the truth, so let me tell you

      If you spin your love around

      The secrets of your dreams

      You may find your love is gone

      And is not quite what it seemed

      To appear to disappear

      Beneath all your darkest fears

      To the revelations of fresh faced youth

      No one will come to save you

      So speak your peace in the murmurs drawn

      But youth is wasted on the young

      Your strength is my weakness, your weakness my hate

      My love for you just can't explain

      Why we're forever frozen, forever beautiful,

      Forever lost inside ourselves

      The night has come to hold us young

    •  7 . Geek U.S.A.
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 5:13

      BMI Number: 1810464

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      Lyrics

      Lover lover let's pretend

      We're born as innocents

      Cast into the world

      With apple eyes

      To wish wish dangerous

      My dear delirious

      To try and leave

      The rest of us behind

      Shot full of diamonds

      And a million years

      The disappointed disappear

      Like they were never here

      Kiss kiss all of this

      The hiss that we had missed

      And understand what can't be understood

      Sear those thoughts of me

      Alone and unhappy

      I never liked me anyway

      If by chance

      Or circumstance

      We should fail

      Don't be so sad

      Shot full of diamonds

      And a million years

      The disappointed disappear

      Like they were never here

      In a dream

      We are connected

      Siamese twins

      At the wrist

      And then I knew we'd been forsaken

      Expelled from paradise

      I can't believe them

      When they say that it's alright

      Words can't define what I feel inside

      Who needs them?

      Caught with this virus of my mind

      I give in to my disease, of my needs

      To my disease, of my needs

      She really loves to break

      Her dad says its OK

      She really loves to break

      And give it all away

      Her ma says she's afraid

      What more can she fake

      She really needs to break

      And give herself away

      She gave it all away

      She gave it all away

      She gave it all away

      We really love the USA

    •  8 . Porcelina Of The Vast Oceans
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 9:21

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2035566

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      Lyrics

      As far as you take me, that's where I believe

      The realm of soft delusions, floating on the leaves

      On a distant shoreline, she waves her arms to me

      As all the thought police, are closing in for sleep

      The dilly dally, of my bright lit stay

      The steam of my misfortunes

      Has given me the power to be afraid

      And in my mind I'm everyone

      And in my mind

      Without a care in this whole world

      Without a care in this life

      It's what you take that makes it right

      Porcelina of the oceans blue

      In the slipstream, of thoughtless thoughts

      The light of all that's good, the light of all that's true

      To the fringes gladly, I walk unadorned

      With gods and their creations

      With filth and disease

      Porcelina, she waits for me there

      With seashell hissing lullabyes

      And whispers fathomed deep inside my own

      Hidden thoughts and alibis

      My secret thoughts come alive

      Without a care in this whole world

      Without a care in this life

      It's what you take that makes it right

      And in my mind I'm everyone

      In my mind I'm everyone of you

      You make it right

      It's all allright

      You make it right

      Porcelina of the oceans blue

    •  9 . Jellybelly
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 3:01

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2035559

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      Lyrics

      Welcome to nowhere fast

      Nothing here ever lasts

      Nothing but memories

      Of what never was

      We're nowhere, we're nowhere, we're nowhere to be

      Nowhere, we're nowhere, we're nowhere to see

      Living makes me sick

      So sick I wish I'd die

      Down in the belly of the beast

      I can't lie

      You're nowhere, you're nowhere, you're nowhere to be

      Nowhere, you're nowhere, you're nowhere to see

      There's nothing left to do

      There's nothing left to feel

      Doesn't matter what you want, so

      To make yourself feel better

      You make it so you'll never

      Give in to your forevers

      And live for always

      And forever, forever, you're forever to be

      Forever, forever, you're forever to me

    • 10 . Cherub Rock
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 4:57

      BMI Number: 1776116

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      Lyrics

      Freak out

      And give in

      Doesn't matter what you believe in

      Stay cool

      And be somebody's fool this year

      'Cause they know

      Who is righteous, What is bold

      So I'm told

      Who wants honey

      As long as there's some money

      Who wants that honey?

      Hipsters unite

      Come align for the big fight to rock for you

      But beware

      All those angels with their wings glued on

      'Cause deep down

      We are frightened and we're scared

      If you don't stare

      Who wants honey

      As long as there's some money

      Who wants that honey?

      Let me out

      Let me out

      Let me out

      Let me out

      Tell me all of your secrets

      Cannot help but believe this is true

      Tell me all of your secrets

      I know, I know, I know,

      Should have listened when I was told

      Who wants honey

      As long as there is some money

      Who wants that honey?

      Let me out

      Let me out

      Let me out

      Let me out

    • 11 . Mayonaise
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 5:49

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 1776131

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      Lyrics

      Fool enough to almost be it

      Cool enough to not quite see it

      Doomed

      Pick your pockets full of sorrow

      And run away with me tomorrow

      June

      We'll try and ease the pain

      But somehow we'll feel the same

      Well, no one knows

      Where our secrets go

      I send a heart to all my dearies

      When your life is so, so dreary

      Dream

      I'm rumored to the straight and narrow

      While the harlots of my perils

      Scream

      And I fail

      But when I can, I will

      Try to understand

      That when I can, I will

      Mother weep the years I'm missing

      All our time can't be given

      Back

      Shut my mouth and strike the demons

      That cursed you and your reasons

      Out of hand and out of season

      Out of love and out of feeling

      So bad

      When I can, I will

      Words defy the plans

      When I can, I will

      Fool enough to almost be it

      And cool enough to not quite see it

      And old enough to always feel this

      Always old, I'll always feel this

      No more promise no more sorrow

      No longer will I follow

      Can anybody hear me

      I just want to be me

      When I can, I will

      Try to understand

      That when I can, I will

    • 12 . X.Y.U.
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 7:07

      Written By:

      BMI Number: 2035579

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      Lyrics

      She didn't wanna be, she didn't wanna know

      She couldn't run away cause she was crazy

      She gave it all away, she saw her baby break

      And in the air it hung that she was dull razors

      And I said, I wanna fill you up, I wanna break you, I wanna give you up

      From one another, another one should come to one another

      No one should come between us

      Still I was lonely, and she was by my side, my one and only

      Knows that she could never hide

      I couldn't feel her, and it was just a game,

      Cause I was lonely and she was crazy

      Rat-tat-tat, ka boom boom, now take that, and just a bit of this

      Cause I'm a watcher, and I'm a doer of none

      Come to save you, cause you're all mine

      I hurt where I can't feel, I feel where I can't hurt

      I know where I can't know, I bleed for me and mine

      Ka-boom, a rat-tat-tat, and some good ole bliss

      Cause I'm a sister, and I'm a motherfuck

      I am made of shamrocks, I am made of stern stuff

      I am never enough, I am the forgotten child

      And I said I wanna fill you up, I wanna break you, I wanna give you up

      From one another, no one should ever come

      In between us, between us and our love

      Mary had a little lamb, her face was white as snow

      And everywhere that mary went I was sure to go

      Now mary's got a problem, and mary's not a stupid girl

      Mary's got some deep shit, and mary does not forget

      And this is how mary's garden grows, and this is how mary has her ghosts

      And into the eyes of the jackyl I say ka-boom

      Now we begin descent, to where we've never been

      There is no going back, this wasn't meant to last

      This is a hell on earth, we are meant to serve

      And she will never learn

      Bye bye, baby goodbye

    • 13 . Hummer
      Details

      Title extra: live 1995.10.20

      Track Length: 6:56

      BMI Number: 1776119

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      Lyrics

      Faith lies in

      The ways of sin

      I chased the charmed

      But I don't want them anymore

      And in their eyes I was alive

      A fool's disguise

      Take me away from you

      Shame my tongue

      Fat with promise all along

      But when I woke up from that sleep

      I was happier than I'd ever been

      When you decide

      That your life is a prize

      Renew and revive

      It's alright honey

      It's alright, yeah

      Happiness will make you wonder

      Will I feel OK?

      It scares the disenchanted

      Far away

      Yeah I want something new

      But what am I supposed to do about you

      Yeah I love you, it's true

      Life's a bummer

      When you're a hummer

      Life's a drag

      Ask yourself a question

      Anyone but me

      I ain't free

      Ask yourself a question

      Anyone but me

      I ain't free

      Do you feel

      Love is real?

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